V8 tomcat libidos growl and howl
October 23, 2004
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Hot cars, hot chicks are disturbing the residents of Williamstown. Louise holds up one of the provocative numberplates.
Photo: Jason South
Williamstown's hot-as-hell mobile discos are about to get the red light, writes Suzanne Carbone.
The numberplate on the slick purple and grey Holden Rodeo ute says "HED-TNR". It sums up the psyche of the male driver. It's about chicks. Other plates say "SYKOVS", "SWICIDE" and BUSTME".
There is no need to go to a nightclub to pick up when you can do so in your mobile disco with thumping stereo, DVD player, air freshener and a testosterone-fuelled macho man behind the wheel with a libido as charged as his engine.
The boom-chikka, boom-chikka gets the chicks, then the boom turns into a bang. Love that burning rubber. That's the talk on The Esplanade in otherwise sleepy Williamstown, home to Premier Steve Bracks, former premier Joan Kirner, several magistrates and other professionals who value Willy's backwater charm and peaceful bay vista. And they want it back. But 19-year-old "Sken the Albanian" from Altona and other unofficial western suburbs Muslims have claimed the turf as their own.
"You pick up because of your car," says Sken, a bouncer, kickboxer and gift to women, apparently. He has four mobile phones: one for his girlfriend, one for bitches (his slant on potentials), one for work and one for business. What type of business? "Business," he says coldly. OK, then, I'd better mind my own... business.
Sken's 1981 orange Mazda RX7 was "totally f---ed" when he bought it last year for $2000 but he has lovingly invested $25,000 to bring it up to the standard for a stud. "It has a custom spray job, custom interior, rotary engine 12A turbo, DVD player, stereo and sub-woofer." Three air fresheners create that boudoir ambience. "When the chicks jump in, they go 'Mmm, that smells nice', and I might get a head job." Lucky him, because all the locals get is a headache.
Hobsons Bay's traffic management unit has run Operation Spinner along the beach for two years after an outcry by the council and residents about noise and speed. Removable bollards have been placed on the road between Forster and Giffard Streets and double lines painted to ban U-turns and burn-outs.
The coppers are being too hard - they need to ease off. It's bull****. Why do they let us buy this stuff if we can't use it?
- Rambo the Lebo
The operation was held 29 times last year and yielded 207 offenders, 291 traffic offences, 67 unroadworthy notices - canaries - and 14 criminal offences. There's nothing like the stigma of a canary to rid the area of cars; red-faced drivers don't want mates seeing the yellow. Don't get 19-year-old Axle started about canaries. "What's wrong with a low car with big wheels?" he demands to know.
Technology has upped the grunt of hoons in the 'hood: they hook up by SMS and the Commodore Cruise Club's "Unofficial Street Cruises/Meets" forum at www.commodoreclub.net, which lists a WeStErN SuBuRbS CrUiSe but "No Street Racing Events Allowed".
The warm weather means Operation Spinner has begun earlier than summer, and wisely so, given that the 32 degrees on October 12 drew 5000 people to the beach in rather ugly scenes: police were pelted with water balloons and stubbies and the road had to be closed.
Last Wednesday night in The Esplanade, Senior Constable Cameron Scott and Senior Constable Norman MacDonald manned the Garden Street corner while the western suburbs Muslims hung further up, the "them and us" ethnic warfare mentality as fuelled as a garlic-laden kebab. The brotherhood denounced State Government plans to confiscate cars under "anti-hooning legislation" because it is just police victimising boys from the west, and Muslims at that, even though one of them admitted to unlicensed driving.
It's their car and they'll tyre it how they want to, claiming low cars with fat wheels are safer. "The coppers are being too hard - they need to ease off," says 22-year-old "Rambo the Lebo" from Altona. "It's bull****. Why do they let us buy this stuff if we can't use it?"
The brotherhood has an unusual sympathiser in Senior Constable Scott, whose opinion has not been totally coloured by the red, green and blue headlight light globes he has seen. "They are not prohibited items for sale but they become illegal when you put them on the car," Senior Constable Scott says. "I sympathise with them that they can purchase these items: however, the legislation says if you want to drive the car it has to comply with the rules."
Senior Constable Scott thought he had seen it all until he pulled over a Trans Am on Wednesday. "It was the biggest stereo I've seen. The two woofers were the size of garbage bins." Size matters when you want to draw the chicks. Cars are not so much a mode of transport but a phallic symbol of prowess.
"It makes me feel like I've got something good, and it attracts attention," says Sken. How many chicks? "Depends how many I want, depends how many I can be bothered with."
Boys and their toys is only part of the story. Female car lover Datto, 27, from Sunshine used to prowl Willy in her 1997 modified yellow Toyota Supra but got sick of being hassled by cops and guys, so she formed the car club Girl Racer Vs. Girl Drifter to pursue her passion in peace. "I spent $35,000 on my car - I had to put my house on hold," Datto says.
Hobsons Bay councillor Angela Altair, armed with her "hoon file", has led the push for locals to reclaim their beach, saying the problem shifted to Williamstown after a crackdown at Altona when a child died in a burn-out accident. Next Tuesday, the council will introduce an irresponsible behaviour bylaw to augment bans on loud music and alcohol.
Zak, 20, says one solution is for police to hold legal drag racing in the inner city, similar to Sunshine's former Operation Drag Safe, where two purpose-built police drag race cars were used for "race a cop" meetings.
The brotherhood resents being treated like the bad guys. Many think they are doing the right thing by shunning violent nightclubs.
"Discos are full of heroes that want to stab guys," Zak says. They would much rather spin their discs behind the wheel, especially Sken the stud, whose favourite tune is Bang This. Boom-chikka, bang.
